You can’t possibly move forward with clarity if you are looking backwards. I’ve been living in the past, making same mistakes pretty much all of my life. Churning over and over conversations, reliving pointless moments constantly. What’s the point? I can never go back. And I would never want to.
I am exactly where I should be doing what I should be doing. I literally regret nothing I have said or done in my entire life. All of the good times, bad times, arguments, lovers, break ups, crashes amd illnesses have all shaped me into the person I am today. I am who I am meant to be. For the first time in my life I actually love myself.
The blog title is a quote from ” the girl in the spiders web”, an amazing film and book. It was the young lad In the film that said it just after his dad was killed. It immediately struck me as a cold statement, but after a while I understood it better. It’s not about forgetting the past, just letting go. Absolutely nothing about the past can be changed, don’t dwell on it.
Living in the past can screw you up quicker than most other things. I know, I’ve done it for years. My whole therapy has been based in my past, churning up and letting go of all the shit that has been holding me back. Now I’m letting go, I am finally free, finally alive and finally happy just being me.