Take me to church

I was hoping for a lay in. My brain had other ideas. I’d set my alarm for 8am, but I was wide awake at 4am. My mind has decided that I need to feel anxious just laying here in my bed. Thanks alot.

When awake I’m aware of exactly what thoughts enter my mind and bring on the burning wave of fear, but to be woken up by this invisible demon is something else.

On the positive side, the first thing I did was to take my medication, yesterday I forgot until late in the afternoon. I can’t write the whole day off just because of my waking thoughts and feelings.

I need to get out of this cycle of waking in fear, I need to wake feeling positive about myself. I need to do something today that will change my tomorrow.

Hopefully soon my energy will return. I haven’t been for my walk for a couple of weeks.

If it was open, today I would go to church, its peaceful there…….

About catmann1973

Hi, I’m Martin. 47 years old, living in Suffolk. I have three amazing grown up children. I have the best family and friends in the world. I am a football fan, love going to the gym and I am a motorcycle pilot. I’ve had mental health problems all of my life. This site is about my past, present and future. I’m hoping to make it easier for people to be able to speak freely about mental health. It can affect anyone at anytime.


  1. Go for a walk in nature’s church, a woodland walk calms the mind xxxx

    1. I may well do xx

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