I love music, I always have. I could live without television quite happily, but not without music. As a child I always used to love it when my mum and dad had their music on, it was like a treat. Over the years I have managed to see some amazing bands play live. Although of course my anxiety hasn’t always made it the pleasurable experience that I was hoping for. Probably the most anxious I have ever been at a concert was when I went to see the red hot chilli peppers at the o2 arena in London. I was anxious just being in the crowd ( a full betablocker and polo job) and when I got to my seat it became far worse. We were sitting near the back high up among the gods ( I’m not good with heights). If you have been to the o2 you will know what I mean. The floor is very steep high up. I spent most of the time holding onto my seat for dear life I thought I was going to pass out and fall over. My girlfriend at the time was up dancing having the time of her life. It wasn’t always that bad though.

The thing I love most about music is the feeling of escape and freedom it gives me. It can stir up a lot of different emotions. We all have the one song that we hate and cant stand to listen to, and that one song that we can’t get enough of.

Music is a very important part of my recovery. I have have found that if I listen to the songs that I listened to as a teenager, it takes me back there. It takes me back to a time when I was happier, free. If I put on appetite for destruction by guns n roses, I am a 14 year old boy with not a care in the world. It helps me to forget the present.

I have always dreamed of being a lead guitarist in a rock band touring the world. The only slight problem is, I have no musical talent what so ever. At primary school I was allowed to hold the triangle, sometimes I was allowed to hit it.

My taste in music has changed over the years. As a teenager and for a large part of my life I have been a metal head. Now I can listen to and enjoy just about anything. I’m currently addicted to the album “nightmare” by avenged sevenfold . A band I have seen 3 times so far.

It dosen’t matter what taste you have in music, listening to your favourite songs can have a massive positive impact on your mood. Unlike watching a film or reading a book, you can almost instantly decide if you like a song or not. And of course in the day of digital downloads you can hear a song on the radio and have the album on your phone in seconds.

About catmann1973

Hi, I’m Martin. 47 years old, living in Suffolk. I have three amazing grown up children. I have the best family and friends in the world. I am a football fan, love going to the gym and I am a motorcycle pilot. I’ve had mental health problems all of my life. This site is about my past, present and future. I’m hoping to make it easier for people to be able to speak freely about mental health. It can affect anyone at anytime.
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